For Your Amusement

Friday night and that means the weekend's here. I'm ready to be amused. How about you? Yes?

Okay, first up: Jace. Jace is good Friday night amusement. Actually, he's pretty good amusement most of the time. But a week or so ago, I was reading his Sawdust and Cowpies blog post about Match.com profiles--click over there and read it when you're done here--and what really cracked me up was the link to a site selling man girdles. Where have I been all my life that I didn't really know about man girdles?

What do you think, ladies? The compression tanksuit for your consideration.

Or my favorite--the Tri Top Chest Binder. What?

Am I the only one who think this one doesn't cover quite enough? Or maybe it's made for beer-drinkers--makes sense that it would need to be a little less restrictive over the belly, right?

Yes, they do have girdles for hernia support at that site, which I can certainly understand, but some of the others? How about a padded rear brief?

I watched a man crossing the street this morning while I was stopped at a red light, and I noticed he had a girly rear end, all large, round and stuck up high--it looked kind of odd and out of place. Seriously, I don't sit and watch men's rear ends all day, but this one really stood out--pun intended! Now I'm wondering if he was wearing one of these?!

If you want to browse more man girdles, click HERE. Maybe you'll find just the right something for that special someone in your life!

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I also thought I'd share this with you--it was sent to me by my friend Julia.

68 AND PREGNANT ~

A woman went to the emergency room, where she was seen by a young new doctor. After about 3 minutes in the examination room, the doctor told her she was pregnant. She burst out of the room and ran down the corridor screaming.

An older doctor stopped her and asked what the problem was; after listening to her story, he calmed her down and sat her in another room. Then, the doctor marched down the hallway to the first doctor's room.

"What the heck's wrong with you?" he demanded. "This woman is 68 years old, she has two grown children and several grandchildren and you told her she was pregnant???!!!"

The new doctor continued to write on his clipboard and without looking up said:.........."Does she still have the hiccups?

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And finally since it IS Easter weekend, I thought I'd leave you with this thoughtful advice:

Chocolate is a health food. Chocolate is derived from cacao beans. Bean = vegetable. Sugar is derived either from sugar beets or sugar cane, and both are vegetables. And, of course, the milk/cream in chocolate is dairy. So eat more chocolate to meet the dietary requirements for daily vegetable and dairy intake. This is especially recommended for women since we need more of the calcium found in dairy products.

There! Now don't you feel a WHOLE lot less guilty?!