Baby It's Cold Outside!

The weather outside is frightful! Okay, you're right--it's really NOT frightful, but it IS a tad chilly. I don't know why, but for some reason, I tend to forget how chilly it can get in the winter in Sacramento. Maybe it's because of the five to seven months of 100-PLUS degree temperatures we normally get. We tend to forget it's ever going to cool down again.

When I left work today (and, by the way, can I get a little applause for having gotten out of bed the day after Christmas and hauled myself into the office? I know it's still a holiday in many parts of the world, but that excuse doesn't go over well here!) it was 46 degrees. And yes, as a matter of fact I DO realize that 46 degrees is much warmer than many parts of the northern hemisphere. But still . . . . And did I mention the wind? We all know about the wind chill factor, right? I'm not sure what that would have made the temps feel like tonight, but I can tell you I was shivering! Not to mention the fact that I could have been wearing THREE bras and it would have still been obvious I was cold! And why does it take car heaters and seat warmers so darn long to warm up? With all our modern technology, you'd think they could solve that problem, wouldn't you? I'd happily trade cell phones for a little automotive heat in the winter! (At least I'd happily trade all the cell phones belonging to the idiot drivers ahead of and to the sides of me who are too busy talking on their cell phones to pay attention to their driving!)

And just so you can understand why I'm whining about the cold, I should tell you that I don't wear a coat. Yeah, I can hear you all saying it's my own darn fault if I'm cold, but there are reasons--really!

1. Hey, it's California! It's not supposed to be that cold in California, is it?! (Heck, our UPS driver, Nanette, wears shorts year round!)

2. I have a coat. I have a couple coats. I actually do BUY coats and then I decide for one reason or another that I don't really like them after all. But not until I've worn them several times and it's too late to return them. My latest coat, which I bought a couple years ago, is a pretty blue thing with a removeable furry collar (not real fur, so don't mail me any red dye to throw on myself!). But I found when I wore it a couple times that it has the worst static cling. During the summer, we chant the Sacramento mantra, "But it's a DRY heat." Well, you know what? It's a dry cold too, and static electricity is horrible!

3. If we wear a coat to the office, there's nowhere to put it. Well, nowhere convenient anyway. We're not allowed to keep coats hung at our desks because it doesn't look all neat and tidy, but the only coat closet is a small one at the farthest point away from the entrance/exit, and I'm absolutely positive I'd walk out every night without it and then have to decide whether to unlock the doors to go back in and retrieve it or shiver in the car for awhile. It's also the closet where the dry cleaner drops off the attorneys' suits and shirts, and it's often stuffed to overflowing with starched white shirts.

We used to have a coat closet. Then we got an Indian statue instead. They ("they" being the powers that be) had the Indian brought in by crane, lowered through the center skylight, and mounted on a rotating pedestal in the center of the office--in the center of what's actually our little law library. Then they found that you couldn't quite see him in all his glory from all parts of the office unless they removed the top two rows of bookshelves. So they removed the shelves and had to find another place for the books. That's when they turned the coat closet into a little library annex. That's when what used to be the janitor's closet back by the bathrooms became the coat closet. (Actually it still IS the janitors closet. Besides the starched white shirts, it holds light bulbs, cleaning supplies, and a large trash can on wheels.) And that's when I started shivering my rear end (and other body parts) off in the winter.

Oh, and by the way, the next line of that song--"But the fire is so delightful"? We have a new law here in Sacramento and a couple of the surrounding counties. Now we have "no burn" days when we're not allowed to have a fire in our fireplace or wood/pellet stove. Apparently, depending on weather conditions, smoke from our fireplaces can sit in one place and not disburse, which causes air pollution.

At least I DO know that once the rainy season starts, the temperatures (and the static electricity) won't be quite so bad. Our rainy season usually starts sometime around January or February, so it won't be too long now. Of course, living here in Sacramento, which is situated at the confluence of two large rivers, means that the rainy season often brings with it flooding. One of those rivers is about a block from my office. And did I mention that "they" don't like us to keep row boats at our desks either?!